Are You Caught in a Cult?

People long to belong, whether it’s the desire to be part of a family, a team or a circle of friends, we crave connection. People relish relationships especially if they are positive. Who doesn’t want to be around others who give compliments and see talents in us that may have been lying dormant? 

When we are surrounded by people who offer hope for a better future, we tend to latch on to them. We feel as if we are part of a unique organization, we feel recognized, special and seen.

But what happens when the association with a particular group sparks ideas that become unhealthy?  Do we recognize the first intrusions of peculiar notions?

What Makes a Cult Attractive in the First Place?

For individuals who may have experienced periods of isolation or relational trauma, the search for environments that offer understanding, and acceptance would only seem natural. People who have been abused as children may be longing for connection and approval. 

For a struggling person who found their way into a cult, the instant warmth and acceptance they experienced may have felt like a lifeline to them. When they were welcomed by friendly people it probably made it impossible for them to discern the underlying manipulation. This group made them feel understood and connected.

There may have been really good music or social events that drew them into this new crowd. Perhaps messages were delivered that sounded encouraging, or stories were shared that the individual could relate to. Maybe they saw the leader as a loving father figure who valued them. All of these elements contribute to making a cult look attractive to someone seeking acceptance.

What is a Cult Really Like? Cults are organizations that can be religious or spiritual in nature, while other versions can take on a social or political belief system. These unhealthy groups often take advantage of these human needs by marketing their organization as a safe haven. The reality is that they intentionally manipulate people who are navigating the pain of being misunderstood or mistreated. Cults usually have a leader who is charismatic or skilled at promoting extreme devotion to themself. The purpose is to gather followers and take advantage of them whether it’s financially, emotionally or sexually in order to control them for their own benefit. Cults are dangerous and abusive.

What does a Cult Look Like? The head of the cult tends to have a grandiose self image and positions themself as supreme leader who demands strict obedience without input from the public. They can be domineering while exercising power without restraint. They do not feel remorse for hurting others and never apologize for their actions. They will minimize people’s freedom of choice using social or even legal restrictions. The leader usually positions themself as the chosen one who craves constant praise and exercises power through harsh and even cruel methods. They reject all accountability. They vacillate between making their followers feel deeply loved and then brutally rejected. The leader will convince others to believe they are the one in charge and therefore the exclusive source for truth with a capital “T”.

When abuse is committed by cult leaders, and becomes revealed, it is usually dismissed as lies of the enemy, or at the very least forgiven. After all, the leaders are the ones "appointed by God” to show others the true path to freedom, enlightenment, greatness - just fill in the blank. Somehow their outrageous behavior gets a free pass - no questions asked.

In our next blog we will learn how to recognize the red flags.

There are features most cults share and if we learn about them, it will help us avoid the tentacles of cult-like persons who may offer the trappings of such membership.

We invite you to learn how to 

Recognize the Red Flags in Are You Caught in a Cult? Part 2

This information has been provided to help people who have been drawn into unhealthy controlling organizations. If you wish to learn more, or care to share your story to help others, please contact us at Glue Your Life Back To Better.com

Back to Better Blog is presented in partnership with BacktoBetter.com and Brilliant Beam Media.